Old Uffingtonians Association (1994)

   Willesden County Grammar School                         Ex-Pupils 1924-1967                    


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'Draft' School Magazine - Easter 1943!

A scuffed, dog-eared parchment was found in the archives containing this draft School Magazine,
written somewhere between Northampton and Willesden.



Willesden County School Magazine

No.2 Easter 1943
Editor J. W. Martindale
Asst. Editors P. G. Robinson, S. J. Carne



In penning this, the second editorial of the revised School Magazine, our first duty is undoubtedly to express our sincere thanks to the people who helped to make our first number possible. Not every form came up to scratch, but, speaking generally, the response was quite satisfactory.

This term we are losing Davey, our former editor, who is also the eminent poet of the “sixth”. We have already lost de Grey, an extremely popular member of the “Science Sixth”.

We welcome the formation of a School A.T.C. flight. We understand that “ fifth formers” have many calls on their time, but, nevertheless, we feel that their response could have been better.

This flight took an active part in the recent “Wings for Victory” campaign, which proved very successful. Special mention of the School Savings Group must also be made.

Two traditions of the magazine have been introduced into this issue. They are the “Book of Uff” and the “Forum”. They proved very popular in the past, and we hope they will do so in the future.

This term, the Staff has been helped a great deal by the excellent services of the three students, Miss Baker, Miss Course and Miss Stuart. We are sure everyone will join with me in thanking them.

J.W.M. P.G.R.


For some weeks now the School has been invaded by a cluster of blue uniforms with silver buttons. For the uninitiated, these lonely few are in the Air Training Corps and twice a week they attend classes officiated by members of the staff, hence the sprinkle of blue occurring twice during the course of the week. So far our compact little flight has been a great success showing that there is at least some spirit of the right sort prevalent in the School. The flight as regards numbers, is divided fairly evenly between the IV and VI forms, with only one “fifth former”. The lack of fifth form support is rather disappointing, but it is hoped that a few more might join the ranks in the near future.

The work is interesting as well as instructive. This is borne out by the fact, that all the fifth and sixth form members of the flight were previously in other A.T.C. flights.

The main objection to the flight seems to be the fact, that school homework might interfere with the A.T.C. activities. This is hardly the case, for the activities finish at 5.45pm on Mondays and Wednesdays also 7-9pm on the latter day. Subjects studied are Morse, Navigation, Wireless and P.T. on Wednesdays, which provide plenty of scope for the keen cadet. To finish, I might add that the only way it is possible to enter the R.A.F. now is through the portals of the A.T.C.

G.E.G. (VI)

More Hiawatha

Learned the language of the fishes,
Learned their names and all their secrets,
How the minnow swam so swiftly,
Whereof the trout her eggs did lay,
How the salmon leapt so swiftly,
Why the bream was always timid,
Why the eel had such a blunt nose,
Called them Hiawatha’s children.

Michael Mummery, 1A.

A Breeze

Over the meadows came a breeze
Kissing the fruit on the orchard trees,
Rubbing a scare-crow’s lifeless arms,
Swirling up chaff throughout the barns,
Rustling and whistling through garden hedges,
Sweeping and dancing through moorland sedges,
Rushing and prancing at all windmills,
Scurrying away to meet the hills.

A day in the life of a Sixth Former

9.25 am Arrives at school, trips over a “fag” in the doorway. Sings the hymn 90% out of tune.

9.45-11.00 Attends a lesson during which he:-
        Writes 9.3 lines of notes.
        Draws 2.4 diagrams.
        Loses 21d at poker.
        Thinks about a) girls b) women c) girls

11.15-12.30 Nothing can be ascertained as to his activities during this period. He remains locked in the dark room, conducting experiments on Light – who light is, and what she is doing there, must remain for ever a closed book.

12.30-1pm Talks politics, to keep his mind off the ordeal to come

1.10pm School dinner (after this, there is usually a short period of prayer for the souls of those, who failed to return)

1.45-3.45 Spent in the Advanced Lab. Preparing the morrow’s School Dinner – this is usually known as “doing Zoology”.

When he arrives home after he:-
        a) Listens to Harry Parry
        b) Listens to Symphony Concert
        c) Reads “No Orchids for Miss Blandish”
        d) Reads “Das Kapital” by Marx.
        e) Does homework.
        f) Decides to end it all and places his head in the gas-oven.

During the week-end he:- Attends 1.01 dances, flirts with 3.2 girls, escorts 1.2 girls home from dances, has his face slapped 3 times. On the way home from a dance he talks about:-
        a) Higher Mathematics
        b) the School Staff
        c) the cinema
        d) other girls
        e) the moon
            etc, etc, etc.

My research continues G.S. (VI)

The Haunted House

The house was still and silent,
The lights were burning low,
The embers of the fire
Sent forth an eerie glow
- Outside fell the snow.

I heard a ghastly cry
Of someone deep in pain,
I was silent for a moment
Then it came again!
- Cry from the lane.

I stood quite still and listened,
Was it a savage rat?
I wanted to escape – when
I stumbled on the mat,
- Found my Persian cat.

(Leila Levy 2alpha)

Our Merchantmen

The merchant ships upon the sea,
When the wind blows loud and strong,
Battle bravely for our land
Through days and nights however long.

Through wind and sleet, hail and snow
They bring us food from distant lands,
And in the boiler rooms below,
They work with grimy hands.

They do not wear a uniform
With golden braid and tabs,
They do not need a uniform,
Just a little badge.

When the war is over,
And it is quiet again,
We are all sure to remember
These lads of such great fame.

(Mary Burton 3beta)

The Book of Uff

Whilst “digging for victory” the other week a piece of parchment was found by an associate. It was not written by the same person, who wrote the previous articles. We detected the special “everlasting” ink provided to the youths and maidens. Now war came to the citadel of UFF. And the elders and centurions did put their heads together, and the youths and maidens were removed from the citadel. And they arrived at the village of Npten, where they were received by the citizens with open arms and closed doors.

Now there were also in this village, the youths of the citadel of Creigh and the maidens of Bren. And Coo, the double centurion of Npten, said that the youths and maidens should be separate. And Pop did have to cycle from the citadel where the boys where, to reach Dem in minus five minutes. And he did invoke the help of Sam and Smut, who could do things with minuses. And Bill of the iron chariot did have to loose his steed for lack of fodder. And though he, and Ho and For did strive to conjure up some substitute, they did fail, and Bill did have to walk. And Dot did have two maidens “billeted on him”.

Now Dug, one of the centurions of Creigh, did say that there should be a citadel set aside for the youths and maidens to play. For he did say that “there is time to laugh, and a time to dance” (Eccles 111.4.).

Now did some youths and maidens return to Uff. And one night whilst Bill was watching the fires, there came a loud noise, and lo! A corridor was gone. It was even more mysterious then the wonders of Ho, who could make almost anything disappear and the wonders of Ing, who could do things with rabbits. And Wal did show the youths and maidens the space, and the youths did say “Pity (here the parchment was slightly blurred) wasn’t in it”.

And the youths did don their suits of blue, for they did say that they would have wings. And Par, the carpenter, did also don his suit of blue and did instruct them. And Lew and Bill did also instruct the youths. And Sto and Rob did take the youths for a walk round the citadel in threes. And the youths did look on and pass such comments as “Get up them stairs”.

Such were the happenings of Uff.



Some time before the war, the Staff were asked their pet aversions.  This time I asked the prefects their’s.  And here they are:-

Howard:                                        Crooners
Iris Morris:                                  Boys (Birds of a feather ……)
Stella Cole Lichtigfeld:            Watchglasses (?)
Spaul:                                             YOU!
Stoppa:                                           (in A.T.C. uniform)  A tight collar on a hot day
Janet Smyth:                               Magazine Editors
Zelda Davidson:                         Adolescence
Dorothy Currie:                          (admonishing some “fags”) Little brats like these.
Doris White:                                 Junior Brylcreem Boys
Maisie Hardwick:                       Thick-skinned boys
Robinson:                                      Sailors and Victor Mature
Green:                                             exams
Hollingworth:                              A girl named Janice (who may enter this school at summer. Look out Tony)
Hornsby:                                       Works Wonders.

Whilst on my “rounds” many in desperation asked me what mine is. It’s “School Dinner”.              S.J.C.

Guess Who

Any resemblance to any human beings is purely co-incidental.

He’s up on the rostrum a’watching our follies,
Thinking each day – that’s our dear Mr ……..….………..

When people are late, he is waiting to row them,
But still telling jokes (?), Mr ………….…..……

Not trusting the sixth farther than she can sling ‘em,
She’s Lichtigfeld’s darling, we all love Miss ……….…..………

She winces when pupils pronounce “La Vie”, “Lar vy”
But carries on teaching them, good for Miss ……..…….……….
We all admire the taste of his ties,
Flesh coloured ones, they contrast his eyes,
But as we gaze in those hypnotic blue orbs,
We learn all our Physics from dear Mr ………..……………

When seeing him, we always hummery,
He never causes any glummery,
The first form calls him Daddery ………..………….

At classes she is never latesky,
All intruders she does hatesky,
We never dare disturb Miss ……..…………….

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Have you seen Miss Stevens, son?
Miss Stevenson?
No Stevens, son!
Oh! Stevenson. No Stevens, son!
Do you dig me Jackson?

Old Scholar Notes

It has been suggested, that we should compile a list of Old Scholars, who have died serving their country, and of those, who have been decorated. A list of serving Old Scholars is much too long to be included. Many of you have not heard of, or know anything about those, who have given their lives, but I think we should remember them and feel very proud of these brave fellows. They are:-

Sergeant-Pilot L. Slade was killed in a daylight sortie across the Channel.
R. Machin was killed by a dive bomber in Libya in late 1941. He was serving in the Army.
Pilot-Officer P. Wakelin was killed in a flying accident at home, after having served in Libya.
B. Martin (R.A.F.) killed in action.
J. C. Glendinning (R.A.F.) killed in a flying accident.
F. W. Johnson killed by enemy action.
R. Chenery was killed in a flying accident, while training in Canada.
P. Nodes has been reported missing.
E. Templar (R.A. F.) is now a prisoner of war.
F. C. Barker (R.A.S.C.) is also a prisoner. He was captured in Libya.

We must extend our heartiest congratulations to Squadron Leader R. Alabaster and L. Halliday, both of whom have been awarded the D.F.C.

I am pleased to say we have some girls serving in the forces and they seem to be progressing splendidly.

The new list shows that we have more than 80 Uffs serving in H.M.Forces. Good luck to them all and may God speed their safe return.



England as an island, the Motherland of all,
England as the home of children when they call,
England as our pride, through generations passed
England ever will be, as long as life shall last.

The mountains form a back-bone up England’s rugged bay,
They also bring the artists and poets here straight way,
Their pictures and their poems make other people roam
They take them to the mountain’s sphere and then right back to home.

Cumberland is also very beautiful to see,
With lakes and mountains all entwined it makes one happy be,
Then, with rippling waters: Oh! So very near,
It makes the call of freedom ring in every person’s ear.

London as the capital set inland from the coast,
With large rooms and small rooms they hold a mighty host,
Though stately rooms and houses do not agree with me,
London is the only place where I would happy be.

M. Gibbs (1B)